Miss Carolina

Spare a thought for Miss Carolina Caitlin Upton, a contestant at this year's Miss Teen USA beauty pageant. God certainly caressed her with the beauty stick, but when it came to brains it looks like he broke the mould.

As a result, Caitlin's 15 seconds of YouTube fame will go down as notorious rather than victorious. Streaming online, the video shows what happens when the gorgeous Miss Carolina is asked what appears to be a simple question - why she thought a fifth of Americans couldn't locate the USA on a map.

Caitlin should have fluttered her eyelids and given some lip service to world peace, third world empowerment and children being our future. Instead she rambles off on a tangential train of consciousness worthy of Joyce's Finnegan's Wake.

In an almost breathless, completely brainless monologue she attributes American geographical sloppiness to the fact that "a lot of US Americans don't have maps". But that's not all; Caitlin wholeheartedly believes "that our education like such as South Africa and the Iraq and everywhere like such as?over here in the US should help the US".

This toddler grade gibberish might make you think blonde or bimbo, but it's not impossible that Caitlin isn't entirely to blame. After all, the Commander in Chief of her country recently framed the debate on education by asking the following: "The question must be asked: 'Is our children learning?'"

Wii v PS3

There was a time when you could presume the only festivity to dominate the month of October was Halloween. Not so anymore. For some people the Chrimbo shopping spree has already begun.

And if the object of your affections is a gamer, then the toss up could be between Playstation 3 and Sony Wii. Fear not, if you're a novice buyer, help is at hand thanks to an online video.

In this video, left of screen is PS3 represented by the more ample madam, right of screen is the suitably sexy Wii honey. In their own inimitable way, these two ladies argue the case for the best that each console has to offer, pitting technological perfection (PS3) against plain 'ol giddy fun (Wii).

Think of it as your bluffers guide to gaming, but buyer beware, just like batteries, neither lady is included as part of the package.

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